I try not to let other people’s lives get to me, whether it’s worrying about their business or being jealous of something they have. Most of the time I do really well at that, but I have to continually focus on doing this. I am human, so sometimes I fail miserably. In my happiness effort, I’ve spent a lot of time focusing on myself. Frankly, I haven’t had a lot of time to worry about other people or be jealous of something they have.
I was talking with someone who I perceived to have “it all.” I left the conversation realizing again that I shouldn’t think the grass is always greener. I shouldn’t assume anything about anyone. And most of all, I shouldn’t think negative or jealous thoughts about anyone. Every situation is different. When my husband lusts after a new car that drives down the street, I gently remind him that we own our cars. No need to be jealous of someone else’s situation, when we don’t know what exactly that situation is. Be happy with our financial situation and be happy that we don’t have to worry about our cars, we just need to use them.
During this conversation with this friend, I was taken back by what was said. Surprised that what I perceived to be was exactly the opposite. Disappointed in myself that I’ve felt pangs of jealousy against a situation that I had made up in my head. In reality, I was wrong. I’m not sure how wrong, because it’s not my business. Nonetheless, I shouldn’t be jealous about the happiness that other’s share. Not many of us, me included, share the bad stuff about our life. We don’t tell the world when money is tight or when marriage is stressful. Most people don’t talk about being depressed or feeling lonely. We hide behind the happiness and present smiles to the world. I don’t discredit anyone for acting this way, it’s human nature. Just as jealousy is human nature.
I’m taking another stand in my happiness project. Not only will I give people the benefit of the doubt, but I’ll like them for the real people they are. I won’t become jealous of their happiness, I will celebrate with them instead. I will focus on building and continuing healthy relationships, not looking from the sidelines and wishing I had something that they have. I will be happy and confident with my life and in turn be happy for others.
