At 28 weeks, I failed my first test

I got a call from my stand-in nurse last week. I was getting ready for the day, it was 6:15 Pacific time and a sleepy-eyed husband brought my phone into the bathroom. I missed the call, but listened to the voicemail on my elevator ride to my meeting. It was a simple, “call me back.” I knew my day was going to get crazy and Pacific to Central time zones had been screwing up my week. I got to my 7 am meeting a few minutes before it started. I quickly grabbed some breakfast and called her back. I had forgotten that my stand-in nurse is a nervous nelly. {My regular nurse is on maternity leave. I can’t wait until she comes back!} This nurse recently checked my urine sample and said, “hmm, your protein is a little high.” Bryan and I glanced at each other while he mouthed, “what??” When we got to the question portion of my appointment, I asked my doctor what that meant. She said my proteins are always a little elevated. They watch to make sure they don’t change. She showed me where they were on the scale and it was just above no protein. Ok, thanks nervous nurse!

So, while I heard my meeting organizer say, “let’s go around and do introductions,” I listened as nervous nurse said my glucose results came back and they were slightly elevated. I need to do a three-day diet, fast the night before, and do a three-hour glucose test. Ok, I’ve heard of lots of people failing the glucose test. And maybe the McDonald’s that I ate on the way to the one-hour appointment wasn’t the best idea. The quick and dirty appeared to be that she could either mail a copy of the three-day diet or fax it to me. As I was trying to interrupt her to tell her I was traveling and would need her to mail me a copy, she went on to explain the whole program. This woman talked for a solid five-minutes before she took a breathe and I could say anything.

And then I rocked her world. She didn’t know what to do because usually when people call in she schedules the lab appointment. I explained that I was out the whole week and two-days the next also. I think I heard her crumble to the floor. She talked herself off the ledge and decided that I could call her back and then she would put me on hold and call the lab to schedule me. I didn’t have the heart to throw another curve ball and ask if I could do the three-hour test locally instead of spending an hour and a half in the car also. We left it with her agreeing to mail me the diet information and me agreeing to call back when I could look at my calendar as opposed to talking on my phone that has my calendar {and also trying to get into a meeting!}. But before I could hang up she went ahead and told me her schedule. I could call her back that day of course but then she wouldn’t be in the office until next Thursday and Friday.

WHAT?! My next appointment is next Thursday. Why in the world are we having a mental breakdown over getting this done if I can schedule it during my next appointment!? And why, during my last appointment, did my doctor say, “we’ll talk about your results at your next appointment” if it’s not that big of a deal either way. I hate to break it to you nervous nurse, but you’ll be lucky if I make it in before my 32-week appointment to take the three-hour glucose test on results that were slightly elevated. This isn’t my first pregnancy, and while the first was complication-free until showtime, I’m not worried about this. And I’m sure the heck not overly excited to find out the results if you’re going to tell me to monitor my diet. Here’s a little secret about me, I live on sweets and carbs. My husband tries to force feed vegetables into me. I compromise by eating two or three bites, much less than my toddler. I crave chocolate on a daily basis, pregnant or not. And I’m very much looking forward to the holidays. So, let’s calm down about slightly elevated levels and take it one appointment at a time. Until “now” I’ve been the epitome of a healthy pregnancy. Let’s assume the best instead of the worst. Take a deep breath and do that for me, ok? Because I’m trying to stay on track with the image that my doctor has of me – calm, laid back, and easy-going about pregnancy. Women do this everyday, there’s no sense in getting worked up about little or non-existent things. I’m sure we’ll find a way for the lab to draw my blood. After all, I spent almost two-hours in there last time because they were so busy. 🙂

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